WACKY WIZARDS ONLINE CHATROOM
by EveilB
Summary: What happens when Voldemort and his Death Eaters begin to use chatrooms? Read to find out!
1. Chapter 1

WACKY WIZARDS ONLINE CHATROOM

**THEDARKLORD2176 HAS LOGGED ON**

**cruciotoyou HAS LOGGED ON**

THEDARKLORD2176

WHY ON EARTH DID I LET YOU MAKE ME USE THIS STUPID CHAT WEBSITE BELLATRIX. I MEAN EVEN THE NAME INSINUATES HAPPIENESS... YOU BETTER WATCH IT AS MY DISPLEASURE IS COMING YOUR WAY:{

cruciotoyou

...of course my lord. But don't you see how great this is. We can discuss all our- sorry I mean your- evil plans online without mudbloods and bloodtraitors trying to track us down when we you are holding meetings... I have started a few other people with accounts as well.

THEDARKLORD2176

DO YOU DARE CONTRIDICT ME!

cruciotoyou

NO NO MY LORD! WE CAN GO OFF THIS WEBSITE RIGHT NOW:(

**prettylittleponies HAS LOGGED ON**

THEDARKLORD2176

WHAT SORT OF FREAK WOULD CALL THEMSELVES PRETTYLITTLEPONIES THIS CAN'T BE ONE OF MY FOLLOWERS REVEAL YOURSELF!

prettylittleponies

chill out it's sev. the horrible person who set up my account :glare: gave me this idiotic name and i cant figure out how 2 change anything in my account. I h8 u bellatrix! if u come anywhere near me u might find yourself dead:{

cruciotoyou

LOL!Do you see what I meant about online chatting. SO much safer than being in an organised meetings. You meet some real weirdos there! HINT HINT!

THEDARKLORD2176

SILENCE! BOTH OF YOU!STOP YOUR PETTY BICKERING AND LISTEN TO ME!

cruciotoyou

Of course my lord

prettylittleponies

yes of course my lord

THEDARKLORD2176

ANYWAY! BACK TO BEFORE I WAS INTERUPTED BY MINDLESS IDIOTS! :GLARE:

FIRST OF ALL BELLATRIX, I BELIEVE THIS WEBSITE SERVES IT'S PURPOSE FOR THE TIME BEING SO YOU ARE SPARED FOR THE MOMENT. 

cruciotoyou 

:D

THEDARKLORD2176

ANYWAY... I HAVE AN IMPORTANT JOB FOR EACH OF YOU! BELLATRIX, I EXPECT YOU TOO HAVE SET UP AN ACCOUNT FOR EVERYONE OF MY FOLLOWERS. AND AS FOR YOU SNAPE, JUST CONTINUE TO WATCH DUMBLEDORE AND CHECK THAT HE HASN'T HEAR ANYTHING ABOUT OUR NEW MEANS OF COMMUNICATION.

prettylittleponies

r you kidding! that idiot dumbledore wouldnt figure it out if it was written on his face!

cruciotoyou

I can't believe I'm agreeing with mindless pony over there. But Dumbledore is just a guy pretending to be amazing. :Giggle:

prettylittleponies

yeah!this is dumbledore... i am so wonderful and wise. but too wise to try and take over the world. i am the greatest wizard ever! and everything can be solved by love!

cruciotoyou

LOL :D

THEDARKLORD2176

ONCE YOU TWO HAVE FINISHED YOU PATHETIC BITCHY GIRL TALK, IF WE CAN CONTINUE OUR BUISNESS!... I EXPECT YOU TWO TO HAVE COMPLETED YOUR JOBS BY THE END OF NEXT WEEK WHEN WE SHALL TALK AGAIN.

cruciotoyou

Yes my Lord

prettylittleponies

yeah

**THEDARKLORD2176 HAS LOGGED OFF**

cruciotoyou

Well thank god for that! He takes the fun out of everything. Isn't that right pony boy?

prettylittleponies

i resent being called pony boy, anyway i have to attend to other things now, such as writing my diary

cruciotoyou

YOU HAVE A DIARY!LOL!HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

prettylittleponies

no, yes- maybe

**prettylittleponies HAS LOGGED OFF**

cruciotoyou

Well that's just great!I'm talking to myself:(

**cruciotoyou HAS LOGGED OFF**


	2. Chapter 2

WACKY WIZARDS ONLINE CHATROOM

**THEDARKLORD2176 HAS LOGGED ON**

THEDARKLORD2176

DAMN YOU BELLATRIX! WHERE ARE YOU NOW YOU INCOMPETENT FOOL! YOU AGREED TO HELP ME WITH THIS ONLINE MALARKY! YOU AGREED ON THIS TIME... THE IDIOTS THAT WORK FOR ME!

**cruciotoyou HAS LOGGED ON**

cruciotoyou

Here I am my lord, I am sorry for the wait. I was just sorting out accounts for the last few people... :(

THEDARKLORD2176

ANOTHER SUCH SLIP SHALL NOT BE ALLOWED. THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO SAVE YOURSELF FROM MY MIGHTY WRATH :{ OTHERWISE YOU KNOW ONLY THE INEVITABLE IS TOO HAPPEN. AS IT HAS DONE TO SO MANY OTHERS...

cruciotoyou

Understood...gulp

THEDARKLORD2176

ANYWAY SUCH THREATS ARE HARDLY IMPRESSIVE AND SCARY SEEMING IF I DO NOT HAVE A LARGE AUDIENCE. WHERE ARE MY MINIONS!

cruciotoyou

Uh... Do you mean your other followers?

THEDARKLORD2176

YES, YES... WHATEVER YOU SAY...

cruciotoyou

They should be here in little less than a minute... Anyway... Voldy, how is your love life lately? Met anyone nice?

THEDARKLORD2176

WELL YES, I DID MEET A RATHER NICE... HEY, THAT IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS BELLATRIX. YOU NEED TO LEARN WHERE YOU STAND! FAR FAR FAR FAR FAR BELOW ME!

cruciotoyou

Why of course :chuckle: I would never dream of doing it again.

THEDARKLORD2176

WHERE ARE THEY...? I AM LOSING PATIENCE!

cruciotoyou

:whisper: If you ever had any...

THEDARKLORD2176

WHY YOU DISRESPECTFUL...

**lmalfoy512 HAS LOGGED ON**

cruciotoyou

Well no prizes for guessing exactly who this is. When I told you to make up your own name I meant, make up something original! Your name is even less imaginative than the many muggle names I have seen... I mean-

THEDARKLORD2176

SILENCE BELLATRIX! I AM BEGINNING TO FIND YOUR PRESENCE CUMBERSOME ONCE AGAIN. DO YOU UNDERSTAND!

cruciotoyou

Of course my lord :(

lmalfoy321

:gulp:

THEDARKLORD2176

ONCE AGAIN MY THREATS ARE BEING RECOGNISED WITH THE GRANDEUR THEY DESERVE. I WAS ALMOST BEGINNING TO THINK BEING A DARK AND EVIL WIZARD WASN'T WORTH IT. SHOWS WE ARE ALL WRONG... EH... OH YEAH... HAVE I JUST SAID THAT OUT LOUD?

lmalfoy321

eh...um...

THEDARKLORD2176

ANYWAY... TELL ME OF THE OTHERS LUCIUS! WHERE ARE THEY!

lmalfoy321

I am not exactly sure of that...

THEDARKLORD2176

WELL THAT CLEARLY IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH! YOU HAVE BEEN LOWERED TO RECIEVE THE SAME LEVEL OF DISGUST AS BELLATRIX- A.K.A SMART ARSE DOES!

cruciotoyou

That's an insult! Not so much the smart arse part, but malfoy at the same level as me...ew!

THEDARKLORD2176

JUST SHUT UP BELLATRIX... HONESTLY...IT'S JUST ONE THING AFTER ANOTHER. CAN I NOT HAVE A BREAK FROM THIS INCESSANT BICKERING!

**prettylittleponies HAS LOGGED ON**

THEDARKLORD2176

EVERYTIME I LOOK AT THAT NAME I SHIVER! IT IS (SHUDDER) HAPPY SOUNDING:0...

cruciotoyou

On the up side at least you don't have to look at his face:)

prettylittleponies

shut up bellatrix... it isn't as if u are exactly much of a looker yourself... have you looked in a mirror lately! you look like a member of the cradle of filth! have u seen your hair! ever heard of straighteners?

cruciotoyou

Shut up pony face! At least unlike you I tend to have a shower more than once a year!:) Don't think we can't tell! The stink of you could scare skunks! Also, this is a piece of advice from enemy to enemy... IN THE NAME OF MERLIN'S SAGGY PANTS GET A HAIRCUT!

lmalfoy321

eh... I'm confused...

THEDARKLORD2176

ALL OF YOU... JUST SHUT UP!

prettylittleponies

but she-

THEDARKLORD2176

I MEAN IT! ALL OF YOU SHUT UP!... HONESTLY THE CRAP I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IS UNBELIEVABLE... SMART MOUTH BELLATRIX THINKS SHE'S SO GREAT, GREASY HAIRED SMELLY SNIVELLING SNAPE! WHAT HAS THIS WORLD COME TOO! HOW HARD IS IT FOR SOMEONE TO BE A FEARED AND EVIL DARK LORD THESE DAYS!

lmalfoy321

What did I do...? I mean... I didn't...

THEDARKLORD2176

THAT WAS A PRIME EXAMPLE OF WHAT I WAS JUST ABOUT TO GET ONTO... NOW WE HAVE IDIOT NO BRAINS MALFOY TO JOIN THE CLUB, WORST FOLLOWERS EVER! BELLATRIX... I'LL ASK YOU AGAIN... WHERE IS EVERYONE ELSE?

cruciotoyou

I did exactly what I was asked. If your goons could not even manage to follow my instruction then that is their problem not mine! :P

THEDARKLORD2176

YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW BELLATRIX THAT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU THAT CAUSES MY DISCONTENT IS YOUR PROBLEM! :{ I GAVE YOU CLEAR INSTRUCTIONS TO ORGANISE THE MEETING OF US ALL ONLINE, AND THAT WAS ALL. AFTER YEARS OF SLAVEDOM- SORRY EH… SERVICE WITH ME YOU SHOULD UNDERSTANJD THAT I MEAN WHAT I SAY!

cruciotoyou

Yes of course great evil and powerful dark lord! :)

THEDARKLORD2176

HEY I TOLD YOU; ONLY CALL ME THAT IN PRIVATE :)

prettylittleponies

what? :0

lmalfoy321

ok…?

THEDARKLORD2176

EH HEM… NEVER MIND…

ANYWAY, WE WILL CONTINUE PROCEEDINGS WITHOUT THOSE USELESS AND IDIOTIC WIZARDS THAT I CALL MY MIN- SORRY DEATH EATERS!

lmalfoy321

of course my lord

THEDARKLORD2176

YOU KNOW WHAT...WHAT I WAS PREVIOUSLY GOING TO SAY NO LONGER APPLIES, AS SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE NOT EVEN BOTHERED TO SHOW UP. I GIVE UP!:( I AM DOOMED TO LIVE A LIFE WITH UNRESPECTFUL AND UNGREATFUL...EH...FOLLOWERS.

cruciotoyou

-Em...sorry to interrupt you on one of your lengthy and ever so exciting rants (note the sarcasm), but what exactly have I got to be grateful for. I only just got out of Azkaban after all?

Prettylittleponies

and such a shame it was...

THEDARKLORD2176

I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THE STUPID AND IGNORANT TALK OF MERE MORTALS. I AM IN A HUFF...:{ THIS MEETING SHALL BE RESUMED NEXT WEEK...

**THEDARKLORD2176 HAS LOGGED OFF**

cruciotoyou

Someone is slightly sensitive! I say one thing, and he takes it completely the wrong way. OMG!

lmalfoy321

I think you really upset him...(gulp)

cruciotoyou

What would you know spineless git! Me and Voldy are the best of friends...or maybe more...:)

lmalfoy321

what exactly do you mean by that...

cruciotoyou

Oh...Why nothing of course...I am not supposed to tell...

**cruciotoyou HAS LOGGED OFF**

prettylittleponies

this day gets weirder and weirder...:0 I need a rest...

**prettylittleponies HAS LOGGED OFF**

lmalfoy321

why does every one always desert me?:(

**lmalfoy321 HAS LOGGED OFF**


End file.
